Where were you?

Wow,  10 years ago, how much simpler my life was...  I was just a baby, with a baby of my own.  Cole was nearly nine months old and I was babysitting another little boy, a few weeks younger than C.  Back then I could choose what was on the television and every morning I would watch (or at least listen to) the Today Show.  10 years ago today, I watched... Intently, with little interruption.  Those 2 boys were very cuddled that day but very neglected.  I'm sure I didn't interact with them.

I like to pass along news, but this day I hated to be the one to break the story to Brian and my mom, who in turn had to share the devastation with their offices.  Information was hard for them to get, Internets were down and TVs were hard to find, so I was continuing to describe the awful things that I was seeing on the television to them.  In horror.  In disbelief.  I was numb.  That day and for many days to come.  It was very hard to get back to life, to find it worthwhile to do anything normal. 

I went to mass at my church and held a woman's hand.  Her son was on his way to NY to help.  I didn't even know her name but we both cried while singing "America the Beautiful"  I left a scrapbook crop in the middle to stand out on her driveway to light a candle.  The 6 ladies there stood outside for 10 minutes in silence before blowing out the candles and continuing with our photo albums which seems so much more meaningful now.  Flags were half staff for a very long time.

And here I am, 10 years later... Life has gone on.  But I still cried during "America the Beautiful" this morning.  I held my daughter's hand and thought back to how much simpler my life was then.  Before America lost its innocence.  Before the towers fell.  Today I am numb again.